Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Eva Longoria Is The Greatest/But Not As Great As The Great Eastern

...even if she is an absolute minx in the bedroom.

But enough of such flesh based fantasies. There is another story I have been meaning to relay to you, dear reader, about the tale of The Great Eastern, a ship that could beat the Titanic into next week in terms of size and sheer cool factor.

The brain child of Isambard Kingdom Brunel - who earns bonus points for his name alone (can YOU remember who designed the Titanic? No...and it wasn't Leo either) - the ship was designed to carry goods and people to India and Australia around the 1850s, without stopping for fuel. It would be the biggest ship the world had ever seen. Twice the length and five times the weight of any previous ship, it would be the largest moveable object man had ever created.

It had two hulls - yes two - so hitting ice wasn't an issue. Plus, they were both made out of wrought iron. (Talk about hardcore. I want my next Toyota to come with two hulls....) They were so intense about building this thing that when it eventually got pulled apart, they found the remains of some of the young boys who worked on the ship, stuck inbetween these two massive hulls when the walls were riveted in. (Any chance we can build one and fill it with celebrities we don't like? Mischa Barton comes to mind.)

It gets better:

The ship required three million rivets, each an inch thick, all driven by hand by 200 rivet gangs. Each riveting squad had five members - two riveters, one 'holder-on' and two boys ('bash-boys' - one to heat the rivets, the other to insert them into the hole).

While the outer skin was being riveted, the 'holder-on' and his boy were often passing whole days or weeks in the confined space between the hulls, with little light other than that from a candle, and enduring the deafening thunder of 400 riveters' hammers, twelve hours a day, six days a week.

Working on the site was dangerous, and during construction several workers fell to their deaths. One workboy fell head-first from the structure, and was impaled on a standing iron bar. 'After he was dead, his body quivered for some time' said a witness. Another casualty was a visitor, who, 'in prying about, was bending over the head of a pile, when the monkey came down, flattening his head'.

So tell me again why we didn't get a movie about this boat???!!!

Posted by Dave The Hat :: 10:00 AM :: 0 Comments:

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