Friday, October 21, 2005

It's Official! Satan Skates To Work!

In the category of "Great Sporting Names from American Sport" comes National Hockey League right winger Miroslav Satan. Satan, it appears, was born and raised in Slovakia which only proves what the US thought all along during the Cold War: that the USSR was DEMON COUNTRY. Regardless of what we think, our man Satan has had quite a long and successful career with a number of pro teams in the NHL, most recently with the Buffalo Sabres but now with the New York Islanders. Indeed it was the headline in today's paper "Sent From Above: Satan's Goal Helps Save Islanders" that really set me off in a giggle fit. Satan...doing well...OF COURSE he's doing well! He's the PRINCE OF DARKNESS, fools! I always knews the apocolypse would start in New York.

For the record, I'm a Flames man.

Speaking of all good things Satanic, goth rocker Marilyn Manson is planning to launch his own cosmetics line including powder, foundation, lipstick...and HIS OWN FRAGRENCE! Because we all need a little blackness in our lives. Given his alleged reputation for rubbing his sweaty genitals on security guards, I don't think I'd like to imagine what he SMELLS like. "Mmmm. Sweaty Goth Rocker Crotch. This is going to be HUGE with the ladies down at the coven."

Posted by Dave The Hat :: 12:04 PM :: 1 Comments:

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