Monday, January 16, 2006

Boonie and Stardust (I feel a musical coming on)

After nearly seven years, millions of dollars and more than 4 billion kilometres traveled, NASA's latest adventure returned to Earth yesterday...




With a teaspoon of dust.

Now I don't know about you, but for all that time, money and effort, I would want a little more than just a teaspoons' worth! I would want rocks! Flowers! Alien life forms! A long lost clone of Ripley's pet cat! EXTRA GODDAMN FRIES! Maybe I'm just a jaded, fast-food living, angry white boy rap person here, but American TV got it right! We want it bigger, better and NOW dangnamit!

It is in times of great distress such as this, that I turn to every blue blooded Australian male's icon: Boonie. Problem is that at the moment, Boonie just won't shut up:

...there's the Foster's sales guy who was out on the road on Friday delivering a box of 50 Talking Boonies to a hotel when they all came to life and started shouting at him. Luckily they all asked, "When are we going to the pub?"

Ahh Boonie. You make it all worth while.

Finally, it wouldn't be a Monday without some clergy involved in a sex-related controversy: The Church of Norway has forced a priest to resign from a panel set to judge bikini-clad women competing to be the country's Miss Universe contestant. Sad but true. Oh, it is a sorry day when priests cannot judge bikini contests! And lo! Did they weep as she removed her size 8, crying with praise for the Mounds of Sinai...

Posted by Dave The Hat :: 3:48 PM :: 2 Comments:

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